![]() He goes on to explain that you don’t need to have the job of your dreams to be happy in life. “I started to wonder what would happen if we challenged some of these sacred cows? Follow your passion - what could possibly be wrong with that? It’s probably the worst advice I ever got.” Certainly, having goals and striving for worthy causes can be a good thing, but is it possible we’ve taken it too far? Bruce Rowe thinks so. Mike Rowe, the host of the popular TV show Dirty Jobs gives an eye-opening Ted Talk where he debunks the idea that people need to dedicate their lives to chasing ethereal ambitions and god-given missions. Society Is Obsessed With The “Follow Your Passion” Thing Whether you’re sad about it or you don’t care, you might be wondering: Is it wrong to feel this way? What should you do about it? Read on for some answers. Is this you? It might feel like you’re alone, but many, many people find themselves in this same state of mind. I don’t want money, a fancy house, a girlfriend, or even a job.” I have no ambition because there isn’t anything I want. In my off time I play video games and waste time on reddit/youtube just to get through the day and go to bed, only to do it all over again the next day. “There isn’t a single thing I’m passionate about. One Reddit user described the feelings this way: You don’t have a strong network of friends.Įveryone else seems to have goals and dreams that they’re desperately hunting down but you just can’t find it in you to care that much. “Get counseling before one or both of you become entrenched in negative emotions.It feels like everyone else is moving forward but you’re just standing still. “Above all don’t wait until your connection has been seriously damaged before you get help,” says Ms. If you and your partner keep having the same arguments with no progress in sight, seek help from a therapist or marriage counselor. These might include no name-calling or criticizing, making sure each person gets to have a say, really listening to each other and taking a break from the discussion if it gets too heated, as long as you promise to revisit the issues within a day or two. To keep your disagreements from damaging your relationship, set up some respectful ground rules during a calm moment. Fight fairĮven the truest of friends and most compatible partners argue. What is important is respectful, open communication regarding your feelings and dreams. Ignoring problems (another form of keeping secrets) doesn’t make them go away. Secrets and lies weaken the foundation of any relationship. “It’s crucial to listen more than you speak when you’re having a serious discussion.” Be honest “Jumping in and interrupting when your partner is trying to tell you something can make him or her frustrated or discouraged,” says Ms. The way you and your partner say good-bye or hello, or how you celebrate birthdays or anniversaries year after year can help build a strong connection that can keep you emotionally committed during times of conflict.įor example, taking time to kiss your partner good-bye every morning when you leave for work - no matter how late or distracted you are - tells him or her that in the grand scheme of things your relationship is a high priority. “Remembering and nourishing memories of happy times you’ve had together can help you get past irritation and those times when you’re wondering if you want to stay in the relationship,” says Ms. But learning to look beyond a particular bad patch to see your partner objectively and lovingly can pull you through. “But partners who move toward forgiveness are better able to maintain their connection because they make a conscious decision not to dwell on the mistakes their partner has made.” Be realisticĮvery long-term relationship will have its share of disappointments. “People who don’t forgive often have problems maintaining positive feelings toward their partners,” says Ms. Without forgiveness, however, little hurts as well as betrayals can tear a relationship apart. Resentment, anger and blame are normal reactions when your loved one does something hurtful. Here are suggestions on how to strengthen the connection with your partner. “To make it work, couples need the maturity to realize a long-lasting relationship will entail sacrifice, commitment and hard work, but that the payoff of a deeper love and stable, loving home life is well worth the effort.” “We expect a lot from our relationships, and the fact is, long-term marriages or relationships are difficult to sustain, given the pressures most of us live with,” says Sue Maisch, L.S.W., a family and child counselor in Glenwood Springs, Colo. Keeping your primary relationship healthy, positive, supportive and together isn’t easy.
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